Sourgirl-between us, we didn't call it an anything.
But, how do you write online that you created a _________ that covers each other getting what they need FOR RIGHT NOW without a word. I chose contract because it covered that it was an agreement, deeper meaning to both of us than "agreement" normally means (they're commonly broken) and more signficaint to each of us in terms of importance.
Obviously I didn't write out every word.
But-the point was that we took the suggestions, created something that was workable within the limitations of our circumstances and agreed that we'd make it "law" for the next 6 months so that we can each get the space from the things we need space from (like him not having to deal with the romantic relationhip I have with GG-and me not having to fear that if we see each other it's goign to dissolve into an argument about GG).
Ironically-the one thing we've done that BOTH of us, GG and Mimi all thought was sane, rational and PRODUCTIVE (many things were ONE of the first two but not the last before this) seems to have set off a firestorm because I wrote about it.
The irony is-that we had to have SOME SORT OF agreement.
Even an agreement to not speak to each other requires an agreement.
Otherwise, one person keeps trying and the other continues to avoid which creates yet more drama.
We've made an agreement. It's not functional as a "lifetime plan". But it is functional for giving each of us a little space and distance from the conflict, bringing in an educated third party to help navigate through the issues we've been unable to resolve on our own, maintain stability for the kids AND the metamours as well as allowing us the chance to just relax....
FYI-we are good people. If he weren't a good people, I wouldn't be with him. If I weren't a good people, he wouldn't be with me.
That's the whole point-we both know we belong together, we both know we are good people. We just haven't figured out how to make it work smoothly. Kudos in that we're both willing to try.
"Love As Thou Wilt"