Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG
Initially I met RP's and PN's families as a family friend. We built up a certain repertoire based on my being a close personal friend of the family. I felt a little awkward attending family dinners as an "outsider". I was included in some pretty personal events as a friend, so the curiosity of other family members became more and more intense and awkward.
Then we came out to them and all hell broke loose on RP's side. Luckily I had an already formed connection with most of the people involved so after the dust settled we fell back into a natural coexistence without any of the awkwardness.
Yeah we tried this with me meeting 2rings family/friends as a friend but then...well you know the rest. Didn't really go as planned.
On my end I have always maintained that 2rings needs to have his own connections to the people within my life. They need to know him as 2rings rather than my boyfriend (don't want rivalry or loyalty issues here) I agree that this will help in the eventual coming-out altogether. And more than anything I want he and Hubs to have their own connection/friendship. I can see what you mean about Hubs having to be open and genuine with his acceptance of 2rings.
So far he is only known as a friend from work. A close friend from work. He has been to my daughter's bball games, and he attended my daughter's play with his son where I wasn't there- I had gone to opening night, he went to a matinee. He has met my sister who knows everything. And my cousin who knows everything. For that matter they also know KT as 2rings wife someone who went away with me on my girls trip, attended glass-jewelry class etc. 2rings has met my parents in passing but no real conversations. We are definitely going slow, and every couple of months I try to go a bit further with it.
So here's to being able to concentrate on my family for a bit WITH 2rings and Hubs.