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Old 04-20-2011, 05:26 PM
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blackbirdsings blackbirdsings is offline
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 7

This is a useful discussion for me right now. My Husband has recently started dating someone new. I am happy on many levels for this. It is the first time in our relationship that he has been with another woman and I am feeling some feelings. I don't know if I would call them jealousy per say, but its as good a word as any. The thing that has been hard is that he is dating a good friend of mine and she is completely new to poly. She has pulled away from me and I am mostly having feelings of loss over that. I am positive we will work it out but it is sad to me that internalized sexism allows women to choose a man over a close female relationship. I had a great talk with my boyfriend last night and he said something that really gave me a great shift in how I was feeling. (I should note that any feelings I have had have been quickly followed by excitement and love for this newness) He said if he breathes the air it does not take away air from anyone else. I have heard this type of thing in said before, the timing was perfect. There is a wonderful book called "The nibble theory and the kernel of power" by Kaleel Jamison. which talks about a candle being lit and that it only adds to the light when you use your candle to lite another, it does not take any thing away from the original candle. This is more than I had intended to write. thanks for reading.

Last edited by blackbirdsings; 04-20-2011 at 05:28 PM.
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