Originally Posted by Morningglory629
Rory and TP- the point is, don't you think
, in any relationship the art of compromise needs to be practiced. I have studied politics for a long time and it is true that idealogues rarely succeed and almost never maintain a piece in play so to speak. Like politics, relationships are fluid, emotionally driven but based on a seemingly solid foundation of love. I say seemingly
because even the definition of love can change. So like politics you cannot institute practices like veto unless you realize eventually it will be overturned and you will be out on your ear. Vetos do nothing but entrench resentment. Prohibitive stances are fanatical and off-putting in most cases- especially if it is in a supposedly loving relationship, i.e. one that exists of freewill in the first place.
The only thing we as individuals can do is realize our own purpose in life and not pin our
happiness on a moving target. That said if we are happy with ourselves then why would we need to dictate or rule over anyone else in some effort to blame another for our happiness/unhappiness.
Sorry MG, I don't quite follow. I don't think there's a way to compromise in a situation where one partner says, "It's them or me."
For us, I told Indigo from the get go that I wanted a non-monogamous relationship. If he were to change his mind, that would be the end of the relationship. Period. It would suck.
I've been in enough mono relationships to know that I am not a monogamous person. I will either cheat, or break up with the person to pursue other interests. The heartache of leaving a love who forces me to choose or says they can't be with me if I'm poly is nothing compared to the heartache I know I will eventually inflict on them if I allow myself to try and be something I'm not.