Originally Posted by NeonKaos
I'm not sure why this is, but it's been my experience that some people do not consider it "lying" when they tell someone else something because they think it's what the other person wants to hear, as opposed to telling someone the truth even when it may not be the answer they would like to hear. It's their way of following the path of least resistance. Your couple sounds like this kind of modus has been working for them, but it doesn't seem to be working for you. You're gonna have to get them both together in the same room and say "Look, we need to talk about some things."
Remember - you can love someone, and be "in love" with them, and still not make good partners for each other.
Thatīs a very precise descrption of what they do. I had never thought they might actually think that isnīt lying. That makes it a bit easier to understand.
I definitely need to talk a lot of thing to both of them. Together? Iīm not sure. Iīm trying to have the courage to do that.
I loved your point about being able to be in love with someone and still not make good partners. It gives me a lot to think about. Is these what I want in a partner? How can I decide if the nice things they give me are enough to "make up" for the not so nice things? How could I sacrifice all the good things? Is it worth losing everything because there are things I donīt like?
Todayīs a day full of anger and sadness. i feel so guilty for having those feelings