Originally Posted by Ariakas
What is your insecurity? Exactly.. Scared of losing, scared of being dumped, etc
What is the absolute worst case scenario of what can happen?
What do the objects of your insecurity say (aka the peope you are involved with)
In the case of relationships, what do you bring to the table that makes this relationship what it is?
What are the positives of being you?
Ideally this allows you to drag the insecurity out, look at it, beat it up and then live with it. Understanding insecurities rarely disappear, but learning how to cope.
There is a potential last part. On Thursday when their anniversary is done, write down the truth of what happened and compare it. Let's you, in the future see the reality of your worries vs the fantasy.
Best of luck..
Thank you so much for your response. They helped me a lot in trying to confront my insecurities. I now realize:
1) My biggest fear is being alone, again. I was alone for a very long time. Now I know what it is to have someone to talk to, to hug me, to phone me. I am sooooo scared of losing that. I donīt want to be alone again.
2)Worst case scenario is being alone AND depressing myself. Iīm so scared of having a depressive crisis. Iīm so scared iīm expecting too much from them and not being able to deal with reality.
3) At the moment, I canīt really picture my life without her. I just feel so empty when I imagine that
The most shocking thing I discovered is that I have no answers for your last 2 questions. I donīt know what I bring to the relationship, and I donīt know what the positives in me might be. I really donīt undestrand why two amazing persons woulod want to be with me. I guess thatīs where my insecurity comes from. I canīt imagine them WANTING to be with me.
Todayīs a BAD BAD day. But I will do this exercise you suggest. I will write what I feel now, and what I feel on thurday. Thank you so much for helping me find some answers