Originally Posted by JenAgain
I am exhausted. I feel like I speak a foreign language to everybody in this house. The kids don't listen to me the majority of the time. Hubby listens but doesn't understand. Everybody is whining, crying, hanging on me, upset about something. I am emotionally drained. I'm feeling weighed down by guilt and carrying the blame for something that I don't feel i can help. I feel like all of the fingers are pointed at me for being the horrible person that always wants more and can never be satisfied by what she has. I feel like I'm expected to be perfect and I know that I will never achieve that.
Sometimes I just want to give up. Crawl in bed and stay there for as long as possible, so I don't have to be poly, so I don't have to be mono, so I don't have to keep repeating myself over and over when nobody listens. So I can't hurt anybody, or be hurt. I don't want to argue over who is wrong or who is right, or who's fault it is. I just want to sleep, and sleep. I'm tired.
I haven't caught up on the whole thread. I just needed to say:
I can so understand this feeling. I'm sorry that you are having it. Hugs.