I discovered that yesterday when talking with Nick - he said the same thing that I need to accept that fact that this is what poly relationships entail: sex and intimacy. So in a way, I think that is the thing that needs to click into place for me. We had a long talk yesterday and I was sort of upset because he wouldn't put the 2nd girl on hold, and he said he is already basically IN a reltionship with her, (a fact that I was aware of, but in denial about) I realized how unfair my request was.
Apparently gf#1 - her bf is having some real issues and is very angry. Nick told me today that the bf has asked to talk to me, I'm not sure what he wants to talk about, and Nick insinuated that we could have a bitchsession. I am NOT about that, I told him. What issues I have I can talk about, and relay knowledge to him but I am not going to bitch about stuff with this guy - all that does is create a cycle of negativity. I am hoping he just needs some support from someone in a similar situation, and is not wanting to conspire to break things up.