I know this is a bit out of the box but... When I was reading the description of your situation it made me wonder about body language.
Sometimes when I am nervous or feeling unsure of myself my body language becomes very closed and defensive. It's not even something that I consciously intend to do and sometimes it does put people off. So what I did was read up about it and start correcting myself when I was throwing out the "wrong" signals and using more open body language.
Although it definitely didn't instantly put a relationship in my lap, it did make it easier for me to read others and for others to see that I wasn't actually closed to them.
Scar tissue is stronger than regular tissue. Realize the strength, move on.