Originally Posted by BlackUnicorn
I've been accused of being more selfish for wanting to let his wife know than if I were to just carry on the relationship in secret, especially after I made it clear that I don't want the two of them to break up.
That reminds me of when I told people I was seeing a man who had 3 kids. I was 20 and he was 25, and we were friends with benefits.
People assumed he was much older than he actually was (middle aged or so) and that he was married (which he wasn't), and they were fine with it.
But when I came out as polyamorous much later (long after I was done being FWBs with him), that's what people thought was outrageous.