We haven't seeked counseling. We have talked to her friend who is in school to be a marriage counselor, but she is too close to the situation and likely too biased to really count.
I think why this is still bothering me is that there is a part of me that doesn't understand why she did it. I've been there for her the whole relationship, and despite that she would think I'd cheat on her. I've done nothing but be committed to her. A few days before she told me that she didn't love me I walked over a mile through and snowstorm to come and get her. A few days before the wedding I drove through flood waters to make sure we had a DJ for the wedding. I could go on and on about the things I've done for her.
But she has always viewed the glass as half empty. As soon as she gets mad about something she forgets anything good I may have just done. She doesn't think back to the time when I walked through a snowstorm to see her, she thinks of how I was at work and not by her side when her father passed on. Or how when she went on a trip across the country with two guys against my wishes, and then I when she was stuck overnight with one in a hotel room how I wasn't able to do anything to help.
She puts herself in more and more difficult situations, and she gets upset when I can't always rescue her, and she focused and obsesses on those times.