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Old 05-05-2009, 09:34 PM
newgirl newgirl is offline
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Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 2
Default How can I make this better?

Last night, I took a deep breath and told my husband that I am polyamorous. My husband and I are really close and in love. We have a strong 7-year relationship, few sexual problems, and we communicate wonderfully.

I have developed a crush on someone else. More than that, before I knew there was a word for it, I was attempting polyamory. I've never cheated on anyone or wanted to, but I did have a habit of anouncing to previous monogamous partners that I wanted to date someone else while continuing to see them. And it always went terribly wrong. Because ... I didn't really give them an option, I guess.

I told my husband that we need to consider polyamory, but that we can choose monogamy still. And there was lots of me crying and him being hurt. When he gets hurt, he retreats a little. I'm trying to let him do that, but I'm so afraid I've messed everything up.

I'm reading The Ethical Slut, of course. But do you practitioners have any advice on getting through this?

I'm sorry if this is an amateur question or something that's not appropriate for this forum. I don't know any other polyamorous people really.
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