Thread: Coming out
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  #16  
Old 09-22-2009, 10:22 AM
Tia Tia is offline
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Join Date: Sep 2009
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I think if they love you, and you present as happy and centered when you tell them, then they should be happy for you - but they can still worry. My mother ALWAYS worries about me when I talk about a new boyfriend (and my father gets terribly uncomfortable.. I think because he doesn't like the thought of me having sex.. haha).

Now I am opening myself to polyamory I don't expect that to change (though I am sure my mother will gossip about me much more with her husband when I tell her about my new girlfriend AND boyfriend.. haha)...

But sadly our loved ones often have their own insecurities & demons which they might project onto our situations. If you care about your relationship with these people then it's worth remembering that and maybe being patient and more than a little forgiving I think. Let them see you all together.. and how truly happy and at ease you are.. how much you love & support each other... it might make them less judgemental...

There is also (I have found from the friends I've told this last few weeks) a BIG propensity to associate poly attitudes with a desire/freedom for promiscuity. Ha.. I just laugh with them.. let them have their little envious fantasies (I don't blame them tbh, my new loves are both STUNNING!).

In time they will see how dedicated I am to my loves. That I'm not sleeping around and that we are all an important part of each others lives. I am just learning about this lifestyle myself, and my acceptance of it didn't happen instantly. It would be very unfair of me to expect theirs to.

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