Whoa, girls! I wasn't getting that vibe at all.
KIDD, from what I've read I think you and your wife have a beautiful thing going! My husband, Sundance and I are more about the radical honesty too. (When my mother found out about our V arrangement, she said I was our of my mind to think he would be okay with that. I think she would have been more supportive of me having a secret affair.) She doesn't get it -- I can't keep a secret from my husband. It's hopeless! I LOVE sharing things with him, and even when the truth hurts -- Sundance is a lot more like you, in that, he'd rather have the painful truth, than some watered down version of my feelings. Remember that movie, A Few Good Men, when Nicholson says, "You can't handle the truth!" Well, he had a point there -- some people can't, I mean, be careful what you ask for! But it sounds like you ARE. I think you are a very strong man, and the love between you and your wife is strong, too.
The way you met with the new guy and the two of you got on, I think that is really great.
My husband is falling more in love with my BF every day (in a hetero, Catfish-like way
) and it is so cool to see two men growing close like that. I love that by-product of our V. That will help you feel a lot less threatened. The human nature of competion comes into play, but it doesn't have to take over and turn you into sparring animals -- I think the two of you are being the greatest of gentlemen.
The sex is new so naturally there will be some comparisons going on -- but there are so many dimensions to a physical relationship, I think you realize that and know that both relationships can be very, very good and fulfilling to your wife. She is exploring some very interesting things right now (I know, I've been doing a lot of that myself) -- the lessons she learned along the way about sex and love, good and bad, wow, I think it's really cool what she is doing, and I think it's awesome that you are there for the journey. You must really love her -- and she must really know it
Penis size and body size -- what really matters is the human touch, period. I think it can all be good, as long as you are open and loving, and I do think you both are.