Thread: Dating vs. Poly
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Old 03-27-2011, 06:37 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Default Dating vs. Poly

I was wondering what the difference is and what the cause is of people in their 20's using the term poly and not dating.

When I was this age I dated many people and had sex with people without telling people. I always protected myself and it was not frowned upon as this was the norm. Some of the people I dated knew I had other men in my life and at one point there was a room-mate situation where I was with two guys living together... brothers. There was no discussion. No need to discuss, because it was casual and we weren't ever gf/bf. We were dating...

Now it seems the term poly is used quite often for the same behaviour. I want to stress the lack of communication here and lack of consent. There was not consent, because I was my own person and therefore could and did make my own decision. There was no reason to communicate for this reason also.

So what has changed? Is the term "Poly" just different for younger generations? Is there a change in dating? Or is there no change and its really just the same as when I was young with the word poly given to it?

I ask because it has come up a few times lately for me that there seems to be some confusion as to the common themes of poly being about open and honest communication, consent and consideration for others involved. It seems, in the stories I have heard lately that there is little to no need for these common themes, yet there is still the word poly thrown in there...

any thoughts?
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