View Single Post
Old 09-19-2009, 01:02 AM
pokey pokey is offline
Join Date: Aug 2009
Posts: 20

I find that you and I have a lot in common and I wanted to ask you for your advice/comments. I have been in a V for about 7 years. I am married and have a "friend". They are both my partners but we are all straight! We do live together which is really where our problems usually arise. In the beginning the party line was he went through a divorce and the living situations helped him out and we all benefited as a family in addition to sharing expenses etc.. I have small children who adore him and see him as family. His children visit and we all get a long great. That is until the outside world places judgement and asks lots of questions because they think we or I am weird to have another man living in my home. some most think I am having an affair on my husband? I think my family thought eventually he would move on with his life so to speak, get and want his own place as well as get his own girlfriend. We dont tell anyone the real deal because quite honestly it is no one else's business. Our kids are healthy and happy and so are we so why is that not enough for the rest of the world. We don't feel the need to be obvious, anyone around us sees that we are very very good friends and we have so much fun together as 3 as well as when it is all of us and the kids. I have been struggling lately because I often feel paranoid about how everyone views us. We are very active in the community, sports , public jobs etc.. and sometimes questions make me uncomfortable. We have recently talked about if I would maybe feel better if we both had different home bases. My husband and my partner are against that unless it will make me happier. I just cant wrap my head around feeling normal in this society. They both have the attitude like who cares about any of that, it is not important and can shrug it off, but me being the female is the one who has to deal with all of the questions not them. Any advice???
Reply With Quote