View Single Post
Old 03-21-2011, 06:53 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,872

Originally Posted by amnesiac View Post
In virtually every relationship I've been in, particular over the past four years or so, I've experienced a tremendous amount of ambivalence and indecisiveness. as soon as I start reaching the point where I have to start to commit to something, I get this feeling that I'm "locked in" and just feel anxious and suffocated and have this really insistent worry about making the wrong decision... so you can imagine the effect that would have on any feelings I do have for someone. I feel like such a stereotypical guy in my phobia of commitment, and I don't like that.
Feeling locked in, trapped is fine. But understand poly does not make that feel easier. Being poly still requires commitment. It isn't easier because you can suddenly be with other people. I would say its harder sometimes. Relaionships take work...

I'm sorry if this post is completely incoherent -- I guess what I'm trying to ask is, how do you know you're poly, as opposed to just having issues with commitment / decisiveness that need to be addressed in other ways?
I know I am poly because I love two women very deeply. Its hard to deny my polyness then. There is a bit of a machine that surrounds poly but the reality is, if you can love two people romantically, you are poly. What you do with that, is your business and relationship structure.

Don't confuse the freedom of poly with a lack of commitment
Reply With Quote