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Old 03-21-2011, 07:27 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

Ugh, I hate when men say it's "just PMS" or our periods when we're upset. All it means is that he doesn't feel like listening to you! I don't really know what else to say except that it's really clear that more respectful communication is needed. For him to out you without discussing it first - how inconsiderate! And totally self-centered!

I just re-read some of your older posts. Is Nicole the gf who was afraid of being a third wheel back in December? The same one you felt you would rather be platonic with than romantic? Have you done anything to work on the issues underneath all the fights you were having with your husband?

I hate to say it but your husband sounds like he's got some unexpressed anger going on, and he's acting like a jerk. And you keep thinking you have to grin and bear it.

Tell him it's not your PMS - you want to be heard, deserve to be heard, and will not tolerate his dismissiveness! I think you definitely should have been fighting for your equality in this situation way before she moved in. It sounds like he made you accept her, he moved her in, he wants to call all the shots. You haven't really been that attracted to her for months now and have just been putting up with this situation. But it is your home as much as it is his, and you should have a say.

What is it going to take for you to assert yourself?

Does he come here to this forum? Maybe it would be a good idea to invite him and let him read what you've been going through if he won't fucking listen.
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

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Last edited by nycindie; 03-21-2011 at 07:31 AM.
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