Originally Posted by RitaFire
I was curious because many (not all, but many) of the poly people I have encountered so far are either divorced, getting divorced or are separated, or have never been married.
I am wondering how many people are in the same situation as my husband and I. They got married many years ago (at least 10 lets say), with the intention of being monogamous. Then decided to explore poly. I wonder if that causes more emotional distress to one or both partners in the marriage, if the original intention of the marriage was to remain monogamous. Not that things cannot change over the years, we all grow and change.
How many of you married and poly people got married with the original intention of remaining monogamous? And how have you dealt with poly?
My ex and I were married for over 20 years when we decided to open our marriage. Our attempt at poly did not go well, especially for me, as we were unicorn seeking and the woman we found turned out to be not into women, just men, and she and my ex fell head over heels in love. I couldnt handle their NRE, and made them stop the sex, tho allowed them to be friends.
That wasn't the cause of our breakup, however.
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
The single biggest problem with communication is the illusion that it has taken place. --Shaw
me: Mags, female, pansexual, 59, loving and living with
miss pixi, female, pansexual, 37