Oh man, what a sad story.
I hope it helped to get it all out there. It must really hurt to be told by your wife that she thinks she's a complete lesbian, not bi, and that she doesn't desire you anymore.
That, coupled with her hypocrisy in her dating women, but being jealous when you date and/or flirt, really sucks!
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley
There's no lying in polyamory!
I'm a 58 year old woman with 2 partners:
miss pixi, my live-in gf, 36 (together since Jan '09)
Ginger, bf, 61, married, lives nearby (together since Jan '12)