This relationship has been based on lies, deceit and ego since the beginning. It seems like a grab for sex and ownership over others, not love, consideration, integrity, respect and genuine real love as I know it. He might be a good lay, but there are other men that will love you, respect you enough to be honest and forthcoming with information and honour you as he does his other loves. Perhaps someone who is mono who honours only you....
What's with not getting in touch with you for all that time. Did the woman find out and then he tried to make it all hot and steamy for her by telling her you are good to go for a threesome? Did he like the hot sex and want more of it? That really sucks. It sounds like you want love and companionship, not someone that treats you like a toy....
Neither of them are on the same wavelength as you it seems. I have been in that position where I mistook love for sex play and was really damaged and hurt by it. I was naive to think it was love and didn't recognize the signs that it wasn't.... I think you had a good thing going when you started to move on. You still can.
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