Thank you for the awesome feedback, everyone. I'm indeed trying to stay calm and worry less about things.
Amazing to me how much can be chalked up to NRE. Mundane world doesn't really teach one to think in those terms, very new concept to me to think "this too shall pass." Cause, of course, it feels like it never will. It's a torturous passion, can't wait till my lizard brain calms down. I should feed it a cricket maybe.
The thing that bothers me is the inequality in poly-mono. Some folks manage it beautifully, I just don't feel comfy with it. At all. But it seems to be what the heart wants: inconvenient as usual.
Anyway, thanks again y'all.