Originally Posted by YGirl
It doesn't sound unfair to me the way you have described things in your post. You seem to have thought this through and done your part with communicating your needs and your reservations. I think you should do what you feel you must do.
The poor other guy though.
I think of the other guy (whom I again never met) and think this is so unfair to. While I am very jealous, I do not want to see him go through any unnecessary heart ache either. I just feel like we are hitting a nexus point (they are starting to discuss family, meeting family, and holidays coming up) and this just all feels so wrong.
And, to be fair - the last two weeks have shown some of the ugliest sides of both her and myself. While I hope we are through that, I do not want to end a 5.5 year wonderful relationship with ruin and destruction. I would rather walk away keeping the wonderful memories in tact, something we have not been doing recently and I regret.
To be fair to her, her view is that she wants a primary and someone to live with. She questions if that is possible if she remains in this relationship and I believe this is her way of testing that belief out. It is just really too painful to bear witness to for me though. I wish I was stronger for her. I know she loves me and she is clear she doesn't ever want me out of her life; but she doesn't know what that means right now.