Originally Posted by Hades36
This may be off topic, but I've seen a few of your posts and they are really interesting. My wife and I are becoming more and more interested in a triad with a, well...unicorn (?)...but how does that happen? I mean, this time it was an 11th hour save after a trainwrack that was mostly my own fault. But, if my wife and I really wanted to meet a...unicorn (?)...and bring her into our marriage...how would we do that?
There are many threads on these questions if you do a tag search for "unicorn" "unicorns."
From what I know having been here for two years is that many people who have had a successful experience with unicorns just found them by chance, rather than by searching... it seems to me that people have a good friend who turns into something more and then they share their lives together. The relationships that don't seem to work out are the ones where a triad is the only dynamic that is acceptable and when it is forced it implodes on those involved... mostly it seems that husband/male falls more in love with one of the females than the other and that female runs out, or becomes un-in-love with the other female.
I personally don't feel a triad needs to stay a triad. There is nothing wrong with a vee, but people seem to set themselves up and don't talk about what to do if love isn't as strong for one or more of the three. Planning ahead and being a little more open to change would mean that everyone might be more able to adjust and change as time goes on...
Of course often jealousy comes up for the one that is not being "loved" as much, but if they are able to become open to other love and some good boundaries are set when the vee formation begins, then I would think that there could be a great relationship dynamic out of it all. After all, a good metamour relationship is sometimes as good as a partnership. The only difference sometimes is sex, and the lack of interest in investing in a metamour as a partner "that" way. My men are the best of friends and spend more time with each other than most friends do. They are excellent metamours. We have even had threesomes together... but that is not a triad, we have a vee... the love is there, just not the partnership in "that" way as it is in a triad.