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Old 02-28-2011, 04:22 PM
dingedheart dingedheart is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,493

RedPepper Thanks so much fro you reply.

It is very interesting....your thoughts and feelings line up with a lot of us mono's. The label thing may not work....poly ...mono. Maybe it should be people having a poly experience and people having a mono experience. Because you identify as poly and have several relationships doesn't change the automatic human responses to these types of situations. Its only because you love and enjoy this dynamic that you are willing to use every behavior modification tool to help you work through the possible pain and unpleasant drama.
I was surprised that you would be bothered by the mental images of intimate contact. I'm surprised because of the number of yrs in the trench's and because of the number of on going relationships.

You said you were not sure why I wanted to know? I'm confused as to what your unsure of specifically. I guess I was looking for mind set...emotional responses to similar poly partners ever project their situation or relationships onto their mono partners. Meaning has my wife ever thought what things would look like if I started dating multiple women.... very real possibility.

In my wife's case I think no ... but if forced she would see it as exactly as what she has constructed ....which may or may not be what I would choose for myself.

In my situation I've pointed out exactly where my problems are obligatory dates/time, basic time management, etc. all pretty common stuff. I've been vocal about such concerns and there effects but I don't think I've gotten the message across. So I was thinking perhaps a different tack.

Your career sounds fascinating. Can you do forensic art therapy on the old masters? Or is it something where you need to interview the person? who are candidates for such therapy? Not all surprising that the word therapist is used concerning you or your work.

Thanks again D
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