I'm glad you're seeing a counselor
We've communicated quite a bit so I'm not going over it all again here. I just wanted to share something that a Buddhist Nun said in an interview.
"Attachment is the opposite of love. When we are attached to someone we want them to make us happy. When we love someone we want to make them happy."
I know that's simplistic. I'm sure you do want your husband to be happy and much of what is happening for you at the moment is emotional turmoil which you have little control over. Still if you can keep that thought in the back of your mind it might help pull you through the hard times.