Originally Posted by BlackUnicorn
Entirely personal musing follows:
1) People are not interchangeable. Neither are relationships. The love I feel for my friend or mother is different from the love I feel for my partner. The love I feel for one partner is again different from the love I feel for another.
2) Because people and relationships are unique, there are no guarantees that everyone will want everyone in the same way and at the same time for the rest of their lives. However, I think that the fact your wife wants to discuss and embark on this journey together with you speaks volumes for her continuing desire to be with you.
3) Continuing to deny a major part of your self and desires is a sure route to unhappiness.
I think it speaks volumes also. I just don't know if it is something I can do. I agree that denying a major part of oneself is a sure route to unhappiness, but which person has the right to the happiness when there is no compromise? It is either we go through with this and she is happy and I am miserable or we don't and she will never be completely happy and I will constantly feel like I stopped her from finding true happiness. I know I am just speaking in circles at this point, but this has been what has been going through my mind for the past 4 days and it is really starting to get to me.