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Old 02-24-2011, 03:34 PM
Reptigal Reptigal is offline
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Canada
Posts: 6

I just to thank everyone for being so nice. I feel that I should clear a few things up as when I wrote my original post I was very emotional and may have left dome important deets out.

The good news is we are communicating about the situation. I've made my feelings known and that I need more time with him because I feel I'm being shoved away.

A few quick things...
1. we are 2 year apart in age. I'm 23 he's about to turn 25.
2. We are engaged but have no wedding date set because we are in the process of saving money so we can have the wedding we want.
3. We work opposite hours. He works 8-5 and I work 2 part time jobs in the evenings and on weekends. (which has caused some issues)
4. He's in a band with this other girl, they have to communicate as part of their music
5. I'm not bi...but I have found myself attracted to the occasional woman...and would fool around with another woman if I found her attractive

I sat my fiancee down to talk about this whole thing because I couldn't stand feeling like shit. I explained my fears of him leaving me (and yes I do think I'm co-dependent in some areas). He insisted we wants to be with me and loves me and wants to marry me. He said he doesn't understand why he feels this way about this girl and apologized for putting me in this situation. I explained that I have doubts about this girl and am having trouble trusting them. He says she claims that if he left me for her she wouldn't take him (which I'm a little skeptical about) but I'm trying to give HIM the opportunity to prove to me he's being honest.

He's agreed to make more time for me and once we get out of the hockey season (which is taking away must of our time together because I have to be at work to broadcast the NHL games) we will take the time to get out together and make up the time. I've requested he slow down with this other girl. That I need time to think this through and a chance to educate myself.

I'm still uncomfortable about some of this. I feel bad that I secretly hope that by not agreeing to him being allowed to "date" her eventually the feeling will die down. I know that's wrong and manipulative and I don't want to be like that. I wouldn't mind their communication so much if it was only when I was at work or at skating lessons, but it happens even when I'm home and I think that is having more of an effect on me.

Once again thanks for all your kindness and understanding and for not judging me harshly.
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