Originally Posted by LovingRadiance
As for the promise breaking, I DO understand exactly what you are saying. It hurts, a LOT when people break their promises. But, we've all broken promises before and it's not impossible to look into ourselves and see that when we've done it, it usually wasn't out of a desire to hurt the other person, but out of a lack within ourselves. If we aren't able to gain forgiveness for that lack after we've fixed it... where does that leave us? All of us?
I'm NOT telling you that he SHOULD be with that woman or any woman for that matter, just giving you food for thought.
......But, when I realized what path it was that I needed to take, when I figured out how to be real, be true to myself AND be true to both Maca and GG.... I started busting my ass to get myself on the right path. One of the key motivators, was the ongoing support and love from BOTH of them.
I am taking in a lot here and trying to be understanding to my husband and at the same time figure out what I need. We have decided together that we both very much want our marriage to work out. We love each other very much and we have been through a LOT together before this and hopefully will work through this together and be together through much more in the future. Either way we both know that whatever happens we will always love each other and be there for each other (even if it ends up that we are friends only).
That is wonderful that you are in a place now where you have the love that you need and want and they are getting what they need. We all definetely deserve love and forgiveness. Thank you for sharing your story with me.
I am trying not to completely rule out anything anymore. I have told J. that maybe someday we can include A. in our life again, but at this point in time I can not forsee that. I wish her the absolute best. She is a sweet person and I know that she wasn't happy about the cheating and lying to me. However, she still DID what she did (her actions are what bother me) and I had thought that she would have told me the truth - just as I thought he would have.
ANYWAYS...who knows what may happen in the future. We are taking this a day at a time. Also, there is a boyfriend (I know she would consider him a primary) on her side that is a friend of all of ours and he was cheated on as well. She and her BF are trying to figure out what they need and if they can continue also. This is a complicated situation for certain.
Also, on a lighter note: I noticed your "Love as thou wilt" quote. I love the Kushiel Series of books. I have always thought that people should live and love as they wish as long as they are open, honest and loving to each other. I also thought my husband and I were both mono. Heh. But I still believe the "Love as thou wilt" philosphy. I, of course, had a major crush on Jocelyn.