Thread: New & confused.
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Old 02-20-2011, 05:24 PM
GroundedSpirit GroundedSpirit is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: New England USA
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Originally Posted by abhainn View Post
Secondly, I understand why I've been so distraught by his lack of interest in me: I've felt continuously and deeply rejected because he hasn't wanted to share his style of sex with me.
Hi Abhainn,

Yea, this is one of the complex parts of relationships and why sometimes good ones drift towards ignoring the sexual part. Sexual taste varies widely in people and it also changes with the season, wind, age, phase of the moon etc

This is why I'm a big promoter of opening up the sexually compatible dialog early on. And even testing it. Because right now, all you have established is that your styles & preferences aren't in the same place - at least right now.
There's obviously a couple possibilities from here. Maybe your 'style' right now is all you know, all you've been exposed to thus far etc. Maybe you are ready and willing to explore some - broaden your sexual horizons etc. If this is the case you should express this to him as soon as possible. Chances are he would relish the opportunity to try to take you on a new journey of discovery. This can be a very exciting and bonding thing for people. Shared exploration.

On the other hand, you may be happy and comfortable with how you express your sexuality and it's going to be a case that you two aren't going to really be that sexually compatible. That doesn't rule out a relationship, but you would have to just acknowledge up front that sexual pleasure was going to be coming from a different direction - and that would be fine !

Good chance to do some self exploration eh ?

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