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Old 02-20-2011, 02:06 PM
dingedheart dingedheart is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 1,249
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SN

Wish I'd ask the user name question sooner.....thanks....thanks a lot.

I'm a little confused. If your love languages are service and quality time why wouldn't you want to spend time with him? Or put another way if your love language is quality time why would you have to force yourself to spend time with him?

Its kind of funny I was reading your comment of the "affection" and the loss and..... I just got it. You mean my death... right? I couldn't figure out what the loss was because I haven't told her of the changes yet. Maybe ...Or it could she feels a little guilty not being able to help when needed. Could be she wants to look caring to someones who's been injured. When friends and neighbor are sick or injured she always without question is doing things for them... and generally she isn't asked she just does stuff....good friend. I have to say I never thought what you mentioned as a motivation for the new affection. Not real good at reading her motivations and even when I ask direct questions I don't always trust the answers. I just thought it was unusual...timing and all. I never felt she abandoned the family.....she got a better offer. I think this single act somewhat reinforces my position of her doing thing out of obligation. Given a choice there is no choice.

Not goin to be pretty.....and then some. But have been consistently wrong on reactions or actions I might be worried for nothing. I think timing is going to be the key. I think I need to revisit this primary topic and spell out its how it looks to me.

I agreed to this journey... so from an intellectual point of view I get it. And as I said I "think" I may have practiced this very lifestyle as a younger man. Most of my problems are operational.

Rp
You stated NRE is not problem ...or the cause it the result. But seems to be proffered up as an excuse.. Is this a chicken and the egg argument?

My wife will not suffer financially if I were to die...house is paid for..... stocks other investments she would be a part of.... the difference she wouldn't wildly, and or grossly profit form my death.

How would My mentioning my decision to change life ins, be in the spirit of setting an example of how I wish to be treated??? I think it would look like some type of blackmail or pressure or manipulation. Early I debated telling her at all...if its truly symbolic ...why bring it up .... why possibly hurt her...
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