Originally Posted by detritus
So...I've been looking high and low for an unbiased list of pros and cons for each kind of relationship. To no avail. I'm sick of religious moralists saying monogamy is the only ethical way, and sick of poly propoganda saying that poly somehow more evolved or higher-minded.
What are the real pros and cons, assuming your mental health and communication are good in either case? Stuff that doesn't go away once you work through painful issues. Thanks everyone.
I just finished reading "Polyamory in the 21st Century" by Deborah Anapol. In the last chapter she addresses this topic.
Also-she isn't "pro-poly" or "pro-monogamy".
She's anti- "forced monogamy" (meaning that she thinks people should be free to choose monogamy or poly or whatever). I found her to be pretty un-biased. She doesn't take the "if you aren't poly you aren't shit" attitude. Which I greatly appreciated.
Also-I found out about her in the first place from "Mono" on here-who is... well VERY mono.
He preferred her books over other poly books because she's not so cocky and arrogant. She's very... "mono friendly" so to speak.