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Old 02-17-2011, 12:22 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,723

you had a funeral to go to and while you were gone this woman made a long fuck date with a guy she met on line. She told you this was how it was going to be and went and did it. When she got home you freaked out and she left to fuck him some more.

You have every right to feel what you feel and every right to express it. You also have every right to request that she pay attention to your needs and go at a snails pace from here on in....

Unfortunately she has gone ahead of herself and the process that is generally more workable in poly. That will be incredibly hard to come back from.... 24 hours of sex, twice in a row, to nothing is hard. .....Still, if she loves you..... ?

Sorry my friend... I can see some short comings on your part in that the moment she told you about the date you could of said, "no, this isn't what I agreed to..." you agreed to "talk" about opening up, not full steam ahead, do it. no?

This woman is either scared shitless about dealing with your extreme (and very valid) emotions, is completely weak where this man is concerned, or just doesn't give a shit about you... not sure which, but I'm willing to bet its one of these.

BTW, I am also willing to bet that 10 years from now, or earlier, she won't remember the hot sex she had with this guy, or the great make up sex she had with you, but what a shit she was and will wonder how she could of done that. This will likely play a huge part in her future feelings of self worth. I feel for her.... I really do.

Do me a favour... move on, love yourself, and try and forgive her.... cause she might never be able to do that. Moving on will help with that I think. staying and loving her more could possibly only make her self hate worse in the future. In the spirit of D/s, maybe this is the lesson she needs to learn and you can teach her it.

Lastly, why not invite her here to read. Might help.
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