I almost feel as though greeneyes last comment was directed at me as much as it was at EpsilonLyr :: raised eyebrow, then wink ::
That is no to say that I don't agree with what you, greeneyes, are saying. Of course, as you know, I've gotten more picky lately about people's use of "should." It comes off to me as authoritarian, oftentimes, or else I just don't know what people mean by it. "You shall do such and such" "you should do such and such" -- it sounds like a commandment to me.
"Honesty is the best policy" as they say, but "discretion is the better part of valor," if I may pit one cliche against another. I also agree that EpsilonLyr, you will find more happiness the more truth you can share, but greeneyes, there have been times when you have told me you felt I was "pushing things" and left me with the impression that there is such a thing as ramming the truth down someone else's proverbial throat. There's also the question of how much of EpsilonLyr's personal truth he himself understands. There is such a thing as self-discovery, and it hasn't ended for me at 38, nor do I anticipate it will at some future date.
It's sad that we live in a culture that so thoroughly indoctrinates us to hide who we are behind a facade of who we believe others think we ought to be. It's really an inefficient way to try to experience social relationships! What I find works best for me is to "get over myself" and to be willing to say or do something foolish, just being prepared in advance to apologize when the people around me end up with hurt feelings. I mean, what am I, Jesus? LOLZ! I don't believe in anybody being any more "perfect" than anyone else (including you, Jesus, sorry). I cut people slack (starting with myself), I take a risk, I prepare myself to fuck things up, then I roll with the punches. Shit is never as big a deal as I make it.