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Old 02-15-2011, 02:11 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
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Hi,

I am sorry, booklady, if I seemed to be laying "shoulds" on you. Your need for sex with your primary is totally your own business. If you 2 can keep your bond even when your sex is infrequent or absent altogether, and your sex is going only towards other people, that's great.

There is a hormone called oxytocin that is released during sex, which causes a bonding feeling. Personally, I almost always feel more bonded with someone after having sex with them (my primary or one of my other sweeties). But bonding can of course happen from other activities you share as well. Oxytocin can also be released during sharing food, or cuddling.
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Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

Mags (poly, F, 61) loving Pixie (poly, F, 39) since January 2009, living together since 2013
"Master," (mono, M, 36), Pixie's Dom for 3+ years
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