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Old 02-13-2011, 07:09 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,712

Originally Posted by jsw8671 View Post
I never thought that this would be easy, and I hoped that my insight into what I went through would have been able to help me help her work through her problems, but unfortunately that does not seem to be the case. This is probably the hardest thing that our marriage has had to endure yet. Sure, sometimes monogamy is easier, and for those who have wonderful, fulfilling monogamous relationships...good for them. I will say in our case, up until the very recent future...despite the trouble, what we are doing has been infinitely more rewarding, and monogamy was not so much keeping us on a good path...
Oh I know this quote so well! Ha! You are not alone my friend, not alone.... a very common thing amongst those that have started this route and continue on it.

The disgust thing is a bitch huh?! I have felt that way about PN and even Derby when her husband came home. It's important to breath through it and not let it over take logic. Hard to do, but necessary I think. It gets easier and doesn't over take as often for me now. I think that it is part of the over all issues really. She is struggling with the fact that you had sex nd brought a woman to orgasm the first time and is transferring that onto you as a result. If she works through her stuff then I would think that the feeling of disgust she has will work through too. This has been my experience anyway.

Patience, breath and keep at it... it does get better. Its always hard work, but it does get easier and the work seems to be dealt with more quickly as a foundation of what your poly is is set. If that makes sense.
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