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Old 02-13-2011, 07:28 AM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Originally Posted by Purpurea View Post
f. We will not die when our partners cheat on us, it doesn't even keep us from becoming happy, if we don't let it. So, if we are scared that others could cheat on us, we make us emotionally dependent from them, we keep this fear in us alive, that if they cheat on us we won't be able to handle it. But the truth is, we can handle it. It's not nice to be cheated on, but it's no catastrophe either, if we don't make it one. Or in terms of karma: It's bad for their karma, not for ours. But worrying about being cheated on and being devastated when it happens, is bad for our karma.
There is no fear of cheating here though, you two already have. The fear seems to lie in telling her in a timely fashion. No no one will die, but I am willing to bet that a piece of this woman will die when she finds out. That piece being her trust in others and her willingness to make herself vulnerable to another man ever again. You can't bank on her not making this catastophic. She might very well make this HUGE. And she has every right to. She has every right to feel what ever it is that she is feeling. That is human and completely acceptable. Turning this into a nice little package that explains to her that it is okay that he broke his agreement with her is likely not going to go over well I think. I doubt that she is going to buy what you are selling. Of course I could be completely wrong. I wonder if there is not some inkling that this might not go as well as you both think and this is why you aren't telling her as soon as you can.

This woman is not worrying about anyone cheating on her necessarily. You aren't, he isn't... the thing is, Karma comes from actually doing stuff, not musing on it maybe happening. I am willing to bet also that from now on, in any relationship she has that she will be wondering if the man she is with is cheating, because that trust will die a little with this. At least that is usually the case.
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Last edited by redpepper; 02-13-2011 at 07:32 AM.
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