I am spending some time working on this as well. Mine has been brought about due to my beginnings in AA. It has a strong direction in self reflection. Even at my worst I liked looking at myself, but found out, I wasn't looking at everything.
With the help of friends, lovers and AA I have begun to serious look at myself in every way.
How that relates to poly. Well.. it has to. It is part of me. My desires, wants and needs are all rooted in something. I would love to fix that something, but can you turn back time. Can I now not be poly. It is impossible. I deeply love two women and know I can love more. If I hadn't been exposed to poly, who knows, maybe I would never have bothered to find it. Poly brings out my worst fears and insecurities, while also stroking them. I need to find my root problems with fears and insecurities so, the next time I enter into anything remotely poly. I am fine with myself. Ironically these are things I thought I had beat years ago, its amazing how it can all come swooping back to me.
So yes in a round about way I agree. honest self questioning is really important. How can you be honest with the people you love, if you can't be honest with yourself.