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Old 02-10-2011, 03:17 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: In Redpepper's heart
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dragonflysky View Post
For me...."growth" implies an "increase in". There's no guarantee that "stretching" one's self to "grow" will create "increase" in one's life. It could also result in a rubber band effect of snapping...thus lessening one's capacity/abilities...or in this case the "sacrifice" that Mono talks about. For some, stretching one's self to grow....to remain in choice...may be setting a firm boundary or limit and saying "NO!" No this isn't ok. No this won't work for me. No I don't know how to explain myself so you'll understand, or even so that I'll intellectually understand my position. I just know (intuitively?) this won't work for me. Growth wouldn't necessarily be that "I will attempt to see things from your perspective....or try things from your perspective"...it may be "I will respect my perspective and know it is right for me." (This is coming from someone who has been co-dependent in the past and so busy trying to see things from other's perspectives to be "fair" that I often neglected my own wants and needs! For me, "Growth" was learning to say "No" and "Yes" to my wants and needs.)
Thanks for that...it puts things into words for me I think. I need to maintian my health and integrity and trust that Redpepper will do what she must to retain hers. That is all we can ask for
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