I think some jealousy, fear, and insecurity is normal from time to time with any human being. It isn't about just turning it off. It's about learning how to handle it productively.
There is something about your situation that has nagged at me from day 1 though. (And this is only me and something I couldn't handle personally.) You seem to have this stringent "alone time" schedule that I just don't get. To me it takes out some of the natural falling together of the relationship. I understand if it's a scheduled "date night" where only two of you go out once a week or so. But to have strictly scheduled time in your own home while one of you is there being left out? I couldn't handle that at all. What if we're all having a great dinner conversation? "Oh, it's 8PM, WE have to go...see you in an hour."? What if a situation arises where you're all cuddling and it begins to lead to intimacy? "Oh, YOU can't have sex with us because we have scheduled alone time right now"? You are all together and then, suddenly, one is alone. Do these situations arise? How do you handle them? My gf wasn't live in so those things really didn't come up much. But there would be times where I was supposed to stay at her house and we had an overnight sitter and when hubby dropped me off we all got to talking and he'd stay as well. There would be times where she came by to take me out and I wouldn't be in the mood and the two of them would go get a drink and she'd end up staying unexpectedly. It was just a natural flow. I was much more comfortable than if things had to be scheduled.
I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not.