I am a sincere Christian, and so I can only say this from my own Christian perspective. If Lobster is an earnest follower of Christ, he should follow CHRIST where Christ leads. Not where the Church leads, or religious tradition, or his family, or his friends, or you or anyone else. Christ alone is 100% trustworthy; nobody else packs the gear.
That being said, a book which helped me a great deal coming to terms as a Christian dealing with these issues is Divine Sex: Liberating Sex from Religious Tradition by Philo Thelos.