In general, lying to prospective partners is a good way to remove them from being prospective partners. It's no way to engage in what is supposed to be an honest and ethical way of loving.
Next, expecting somebody to be interested in both of you equally--wanting a package deal--is going to limit the pool of potential partners a great deal. Single, bi babes looking to get involved with a couple are referred to as unicorns for a reason (they're quite rare).
I'll suggest reading widely on these boards. There are discussions of unicorns and meeting new people and so forth that can provide a good deal of information.
When speaking of various forms of non-monogamy...it ain't poly if you're just fucking around.
While polyamory, open relationships, and swinging are all distinctly different approaches to non-monogamy, they are not mutually exlusive. Folks can, and some do, engage in more than one of them at a time--and it's all good.