Originally Posted by AKVIC
I want the both of them to myself and they both know this......
First, I would say that your husband probably gets off on the sex "in the moment" and like many people the post sex crash where reason overides passion is making him react that way.
I also doubt if he is willing to share your love and heart as much as he is willing to share your body during those times.
Secondly, you say you want them both to yourself. Does this mean you don't want to share him and your other lover with other women? If so, my question at that point is "do you really want a poly life?"
When one partner gets to enjoy multiple loves and the other is essentially forbidden then you are more polygamist than polyamorous.
I hope you find your way