Originally Posted by redpepper
I have not found one example where all concerned are perfectly happy and understand one another. There are huge compromises
I can honestly say that this is where we are at the moment and neither of us feels compromised. It's been a journey to get here though but isn't anything worthwhile?
Each relationship is unique as is each person's experience of the whole polymono thing. It's a spectrum and RP I think the problems you guys are having is because you are both so firmly fixed at opposite ends.
Part of my process was finding the positives for myself in a polymono relationship. I initially came up with 11 Positives for a mono in a poly relationship
but I could probably come up with more now.
Yes, we've both gone through hard times to get here but I went through hard times in a mono marriage too and never experienced anything like the positives. Yes, who knows how long this will last, but who knows how long anything will last?
I don't agree with RP that with poly poly relationships the love isn't generally taken away. I know of plenty of poly relationships where love has been wrenched away, sometimes very cruelly.
For poly support in a polymono relationship there is also a yahoo group called livingpolymono
I love my polymono relationship and wouldn't change it if I could but as I've said the success or failure of it is a shared experience and not something you can do on your own. It will come down to how far open your partner can stretch his mind and how much work he is prepared to undertake.