Looking for Poly
Hi! Your questions echo ones I've had at times. I was mono for years--in theory. But I had close friendships that, while platonic, were emotionally intimate. Being mono only "worked" for me because my husband was generous about sharing my time and attention.
Eventually, a close friend introduced me to poly, and I realized that for years, I'd been in a non-sexual version of it. It became obvious to me that I had to take the next step and be open to non-traditional relationships in every sense of the word.
"Recruiting" is viable, if you've done your homework and understand the lifestyle and choose people who you see signs of poly-inclination in, I think--but I say that knowing that for many people, the moral and emotional jump is just too big.
Glad you posted--thanks for making me think!