hi again, To clarify, it wasn't a fight it was actually started out a quiet discussion, as her trying to get me to understand her version of primary. That's when I got myself in trouble by saying or asking I should'nt be the "primary"... her words not mine. She seem very hurt to think I could have such a thought. And when I said heated she became emotional not me. She had tears. Anything with quotes around it was close to my words as I can remember. The " whats my up side part " was a rant to all of you. I never said anything about money as she her contributions. As for the money thing rant I really don't give a shit that's just sour grapes looking back. If I didn't have kids I may bitch about the time I wasted,.... want those years back and the like. Stupid I know, I wasted and lost more money than the pocket change I was refering to anyway.
The idea of a hierarchy seems inherent with the use of the word/status of primary. I see a change happening already I don't think she gets her behavior/nre may kill things for me. There maybe nothing to go back to after the Nre wears off. Again I was told nothing was going to change... it was just something she needed to explore. In the beginning she said she had no problems with me having a outside relationship. About a month a go I stopped wearing my wedding band....wow another thing she didn't like. Kind of blown away by her reaction... she's free to date, fuck, whatever and I can't stop wearing a ring. So none of you has tried to remove yourselves as the "primary"???? I'm sure its a question that's never been asked, I get that a lot. Thanks D