Delayed reply given that I've been indisposed & cut-off from the board for a couple days...and that I needed to figure out how to put more than one word together for a post, since the former one L-word variety just didn't seem as appropriate here.
RP: I actually have nothing that I can offer which you probably don't already know. I have a card in my wallet some friends gave me some years ago with a picture of a boat crashing through some waves, and the caption "YOU CAN PLOW THROUGH ANYTHING". I suppose the other upshot is that now you no longer need to worry or speculate about what they'll say...and instead can focus on where the family is, and where it needs to go.
Mono: Your patience in this resembles that of a Saint given the accusations leveled by the GP's. The fact that it's logical and reasonable given the situation out of context, and the paranoia fed to us by the media notwithstanding...I expect there are very few people could take that kind of finger pointing in stride without breaking it and the arm it's attached to.
Can't resist...have to fit the L-word in somewhere...
I guess next time there's a family 'meeting'...everyone better bring there own *LUBE*!