Can you talk to your wife about all of this? This business of just showing up at your office sounds hinky to me. And about his being at
Originally Posted by Fidelia
the party: did your wife know and just not tell you until you were walking up, or was it something else? Because I know that in those same circumstances my Fidelio would have been none too pleased. And for the iffy bf to crack wise at Fidelio's expense? That would have gone over like a fart in church.
Can you tell your wife about your feeling he had read your file? I assume she's the one who would've filled him in.
And where does his wife stand in all of this?
The more I learn about your situation, the more I lean toward thinking you all need to work on communication. Especially between you and your wife. Since you feel the trust between you has been undermined, the two of you together need to come up with a plan to fix that, and asap. If it were me, I would ask that we put further poly explorations on hold for a time so that we could concentrate on repairing our marriage, which would be my top priority.
Thanks Fidelia for your kind words. Yes I have expressed my thoughts and views. Not sure what gets in. Showing up at my business just knocked me off balance a little bit. I own a contracting business, we build things mostly high end homes or should I say we did. Anyway I lobby/ showroom display area, offices, conference rooms, wood shop, storage buildings etc. They came in I offered them each a beer he accepted she declined. She then took him on a little tour... more weird feelings. This happened 7:30m or 8pm on Friday no one but me in the place. Not unusual to see our cars or even different cars there at all different times day or night. Yes I was told as I was getting out of the car " bye the way dick is going to be he. After many months and careful thought he is a perfect example of Nature Vs Nurture. Is he a Dick because people have been calling that years or upon his birth his parents starring lovingly into his eye land turned to each other and said that's a dick. Now I'm pissed I didn't think of this at the party. That may changed the mood. I wouldn't have used it even if I had thought of because didn't know the guy.