I have just learned today about a book written by a counselor (no link because everything I've heard about it is outdated, ignorant rubbish), who states that trying to mix poly and mono in one relationship is akin to giving it the kiss of death. Another blogger is reviewing said book and she knows from my previous comments that this is rubbish, but she still goes so far as to say that "it takes a very special mono to make it work".
I don't feel particularly special but when I put this to a group of monos the consensus was yep special all the way. Maybe we have a need to feel that what we are doing is special?
Does your partner make you feel special? Because I think that secondary monos (for want of a better term) are the most special monos of all.