View Single Post
Old 09-04-2009, 04:56 AM
redpepper's Avatar
redpepper redpepper is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,718

Originally Posted by Ceoli View Post
I have had other friends where we haven't been able to maintain relationships because their overflowing happiness leaves little room for anything else and doesn't tolerate the fact that this is where I'm struggling. They don't leave the space for me to have my own feelings. They don't honor my struggle in their happiness, which makes it more difficult for me to honor their happiness in my struggle.

So I won't hide my happiness in those areas, but I will approach it with a bit of humility and respect for people who may not have had the fortunate situations that I've had.
This was very helpful Ceoli! Thank you.

I think that perhaps some people in my life have made themselves distant out of fear that I won't be humble and respect that they have their own struggles and short comings where their happiness is concerned. I do my best to stay quiet and down play my joy actually. They would no that if they bothered to find out. We will see what happens in time. I am kinda demanding that people get their act together, stop whining and create their own happiness... I suppose that might be a bit grating?

I have a friend that is just as happy in her poly life as I right now and is so "in it." She doesn't always approach others with humility in it and kind of goes on about it all sometimes. It doesn't make people warm to her happiness, but instead makes them want to avoid her as she brings up their own unhappiness by proxy. I even have trouble listening to it as it makes me feel like, in her eyes, my happiness couldn't possibly be as good as hers or as valid.

She had a cranky day recently and was actually a bit cranky with being cranky in light of her AMAZING life. I kind of fell out of favour as I teased her about it..... really I was kind of rolling my eyes and thinking, "could you possibly be more self centered and self involved?!"
Anyone want to be friends on Facebook?
Send me your name via PM
My blog
Reply With Quote